hope you enjoy reading! - mae :)


Jan 30, 2012

Back to Work!


I am definitely back in the office and I survived my first day although I had trouble remembering names.  I couldn't converse in straight english and I feel like I'm undergoing therapy.  I freakin' pronounced the word as tera-fy in front of my Trainer, believe it.

Oh well.

Glad to be waiting for salary again, hahaha!

PS - there was an anxiety factor .. leaving baby home.  But I know I'll be back in the morning and I know I'm leaving him every weekday to capable hands.  I gotta keep working, that's life.

Jan 21, 2012

Raphael is 2 months!

Raphael sleeping on a sunny weekday

I can’t say it was fast because a lot has happened since I gave birth.

Truly, everyday is a milestone for us. We’re doing everything we can so the baby stays healthy, responsive and alert.

Now that Raphael has turned 2 months, he responds better. He smiles a lot especially when he wakes up every 4am-ish for feeding. We always talk to him when he’s awake and every time (morning), he would flash his biggest smile as if he can understand every word we’re saying.  He now has a more defined sleeping pattern as he actually sleeps straight at night. He would typically just wake up when he’s hungry or wants a diaper change. He has also developed a pattern in feeding – every 4hrs or less.

He has a memorabilia for his 2nd month, a gift from his Tita, similar to the pic below which I am yet to upload.  Where can I find one like this here?

 our actual pic of the footprint to follow...

then i found this on the net, looks scary! haha
We love you Raphael!  Happy 2nd monthsary.

Jan 18, 2012


No, I don’t need help.  Or you know what, yes I do.  And we found the perfect solution.
My cousin will help out in taking care of the baby when I start working.  Yey! Solved!

Jan 9, 2012

What is your Baby's Milk?

Mine is formula.  Sigh.

I was hoping to breastfeed my baby but I wasn’t lucky.  I really thought I won’t have issues producing milk dahil mahilig ako sa sabaw, no doubt!!!  “What’s the soup of the day?” is my favorite line. I tried eating lots of soup and food with malunggay.  I also tried supplements but to no avail.  I had wet moments but they weren’t enough to feed the baby.  So when I got really really frustrated (I’m known to be sooooo patient, by the way)and  taking into account my baby's hunger and my near-depression, I fed my baby formula-milk.  Do so at your own risk please.  I did this because I pity my baby, he was crying all the time and he couldn’t sleep well as he was always hungry. :(

When I would offer my breast, he would suck a few times and would cry after because he wasn’t getting anything.  Those scenes were frustrating...big time.   It felt like I wasn’t a mother at all.  The frustration I felt was the main reason why I super hated the pedia who attended us in the hospital.  He never educated me on anything.  I was hoping that as a first time mom, I will be taught on how to deal with breastfeeding, baby caring, etc.  I wasn’t even aware on how to change a diaper!  He wasn't helpful at all.  Again, now I know the benefits of undergoing childbirth classes.  I would have wanted to attend one but Marvin was so conservative.  If you have the chance and resources, I highly suggest that you go for it.  There are so many childbirth classes nowadays.  Books can only give you as much.   And again moms, always demand to talk to your doctors.  Never shy away from asking questions.

So far, my baby is doing very well with formula milk.  We changed from S-26 to Similac through Doctor's prescription.

I support breastfeeding.  If you have the chance and you’re lucky to be able to do so, ALWAYS go for it.

Jan 6, 2012

Raphael: Newborn

Raphael was born November 2011 at 5:35AM
6.38 lbs, 51cm 

This was taken in the hospital, few hours after he was born.  Such a fragile little angel. :)  Everything fitted perfectly well except for his mittens which were still too big for him.  Nurse even had to tape it.

Jan 5, 2012

The Best Things in Life are Free

Let me share with you how I feel now.

I am just overwhelmed..

...with the support that my family and loved ones have given me and are continously giving me.  I couldn't ask for more.  Everything in our house has changed, including our lives and they ALL supported me with it.

I just want to say, THANK YOU. I LOVE YOU ALL.

Jan 4, 2012

First Timer

Now I know the reason why other couples go through birthing lessons.  Not only will it help you while you’re pregnant.. it will also help you on preparing yourself when the baby arrives.

There were things I didn’t know "how to do", even nappy change.  Books can just coach you as much.  Practice and hands on learning is still different.  I remember looking and watching our helpful Nurse when Raphael pooped for the first time. In my head, I was saying “ah, ganun pala”. *grin*

Bathing Raphael was also another challenge.  He doesn’t cry with his Lola the way he does with me.  Note to self:  Bawal gulatin ang newborn, everything has to be done slowly so he won’t cry. Sloooooooowly.  And I'm sure you wouldn't want to see your baby cry. Because when he does, nangingitim talaga!!  Parang walang hangin na sa katawan, nakakatakot!

I'll blog some more discoveries as I encounter them. Weeeee! :)

Jan 3, 2012

7 days after...

I had a seizure attack. 

Everyone got traumatized by the incident.  It was totally unexpected as my blood pressure has always been normal, if not low.  

So that Sunday morning, I was supposed to do my morning routine (move the baby out of bed, go to our sala and feed him) when I fell from the bed during the first attack.  I think I was trying to put baby’s mittens when I suddenly couldn’t control my arms and passed out.  My last memory was looking at the ceiling and terribly shaking.  Having a seizure is like having an epilepsy attack.  I don't know what happened after.  When I woke up and gained consciousness I was already in the emergency room.  Putting everyone's story together, they said I was found under the bed and was immediately put on a chair.  I had blood stains on my dress (I think from biting my tongue).  I was conscious and was answering questions correctly until I was asked if I knew I delivered a baby recently.  I shook my head.  They asked if I knew I have stitches because of CS operation, I was just looking blankly at them.
I had my second attack when Marvin arrived.  He was talking to me, trying to have a conversation on what happened.  I was then brought to the hospital.  Mom said I gained consciousness again when I was being brought out of the car, with a spoon on my mouth.  They were preventing me from biting my tongue.  When I was in the ER, my consciousness came and went.  I saw different people including my OB.  I couldn’t remember being moved to ICU but I woke up and was already there.  The magnesium shots were very painful; they were injected through my buttocks  Even after weeks of being discharged, the pain was still there.

Thankfully, I got out of the hospital after 4 days. 

Looking back, there are so many things they said contributed to the seizure.  OB said it was because I wasn't taking a bath so my body heat rose, mama said 'binat'.  I think it was post natal depression. Hmmmm.

Let's talk about it some other time.

...Happy to be enjoying another LIFE! Thank you Lord!!!

Jan 2, 2012

November 21

Here's my LABOR story :p

6:00am – woke up and went straight to the toilet to pee, feeling just normal.  Another typical Sunday until I saw red stains in my urine.  I know I'm due today so I calmly approached Mama.  I'm 100% sure that if I panic, everyone would go hysterical.  That's another fun story to tell, wouldn't it?

7am or 8am – I decided to go to the hospital but I was experiencing cramps, that I can hardly move, so I waited for Marvin.  The OB who attended me from the ER said I’m 1cm dilated.  I was sent home to wait.  Normally 3cm or up requires confinement already.  Actually, it depends if you want to stay in the hospital early.  Worrying about the bill, I'd rather stay home.  Again, it was just really a typical and ordinary Sunday if not for my complains about my lower back. Ugh.  Painful contractions.  Up until bed time, I was trying my best to tolerate the pain.  I told myself I'll deliver the normal way.  There is no other option than normal.

Past 10PM -  I decided to go to ER again for screening because the lower back pain is now getting unbearable.  I was 2cm dilated when the OB checked.  Imagine the entire day?? and I was just 2cm now??  I was advised that I can now be admitted.  Good Lord! 

at 12:30AM – I was filling up forms.  I can't imagine anyone else doing this for me.  Again, all was calm.  I was wheeled to the Labor Room right after.  I changed to hosp gown and was put on an IV (my first ever!).  The nurse also administered something for the tummy but I can’t remember exactly what medicine it was.  I think it was Buscopan.  Nurse said it's to induce labor? or 'pampahilab'.  By this time, my cramps were already getting stronger.  I seriously felt sharp pressures on my lower back.  Peeing was also a problem.  I wanted to walk a lot (as I've read from the book) and pee but they kept giving me a bed pan.  Another ugh – I’m not used to that so it took a while before I could freely pee.  Whoooo, so many firsts!!

by 1AM – my OB arrived.  First time I saw her in green uniform, cute.  Hello doc!  This is me, tolerating the pain.

by 3AM – stronger and painful contractions. Unbelievably bearable.  And I was getting tired and sleepy but my lower back pains kept me awake.  I also kept refusing Epidural but when the Anesthesiologist arrived, my OB persuaded me to have one.  

So at 4AM something – I was wheeled to the Delivery Room.  It took forever for the anes to administer the drug!  I swear.  That was the longest contractions I can count!  What kept me from shouting at the Anes were the two nurses encouraging me to stay calm and held me all along.  I think I held on too tight onto one of the nurses’ pockets that she ended up with a crumpled uniform, sorry nurse.  And truly, thank you for the support.

I can’t tell the exact time of the event that happened next, they didn’t have a clock in the delivery room that I can see.  All I know was that the Anes kept the room relaxed and soothing through his music.

I was now still lying on the table with both feet propped up, with bright lights focused on....oh you know where.  I was just still, telling my doctor that I think I may poop anytime.  She was just making small talks.  Yun pala, she broke my water bag na.  I know the anesthesia took effect because I didn't feel anything.  She then declared that I had to undergo emergency CS as the baby already pooped.  I felt sad.  All this walking, waiting.. I would still end up on CS. Hay.

It was probably 5 in the morning when I was wheeled out of the Delivery Room going to the Operating Room.  I didn't see anyone on my way out to the hallway.  I was hoping to glance at my family before the procedure.  Then it happened very fast.  Well, emergency CS should always be fast.  Anes gave me a spinal block (I read it from the book so I know what it will do) and altogether at the same time, my OB and nurses uncovered me with my gown, blocked my view of the Operation, placed a BP monitor on my left arm and placed an oxygen mask on my nose.  Music was still playing.  I decided to pass out and sleep this off.  I was very tired and groggy.  Been awake since 6!

Family said it was 5:30AM when they declared the baby was out.  Pedia even took a picture using his iphone (grrr) when they made the baby cry near my right ear.  It was over!!  During this time I heard my OB said “mae, tapos na ha”.

Sometime in the morning, when I gained consciousness, I saw Marvin entered the Operating Room and handed the nurses a support belt.  They also brought the baby in for feeding before I was moved to my room.  Sadly, the baby was just sucking, I didn’t see any milk..which they said was normal.

I stayed in the hospital for 3 days.

Jan 1, 2012

Twenty Twelve

I am very grateful for my 2011.
Even if there were things that didn't go my way... and I hope you had a good year too.  

Remember, count your blessings!  I'm sure you'll feel great.

Looking forward to another wonderful year!!